Grinch

it’s become easy to smile,
and to fake
e v e r y t h i n g;
the giggles are pre recorded,
the light in my eyes come from
a new bulb
in my sad, broken, brain.

I don’t believe in
happiness anymore;
for you took that with you
when you left
on the day where the sun shone brightest
we had ever seen
right
before dinnertime;

and the only thing you left with me
were the bruises on my neck
and the never ending moments of silence.

you were the one that used to tell me
to be happy…
not to let anyone take it away from me,
because it’s mine…
all mine…

but apparently
you took
“what’s mine is yours”
a little bit too literally

all the while
I was still getting used to
leaving my shoes at the door
right next to yours,

mine two sizes smaller
than yours
which is how it was supposed to be
because with the way you left me
I might as well have been your Grinch.

but I never intended to steal the holidays
that we shared together as a family;
I only intended to steal your heart.
but I guess it was never really mine to steal…

you, though,
you were allowed to steal my happiness—
for it was your happiness to begin with—
and you gave me the real smiles
and giggles
and light in my eyes.

and, even if it wasn’t yours at first,
I still would have given it all to you,
wrapped in a bow,
because all I ever wanted,
was for you to be happy,
which is why I’ll let you think
I’m the Grinch.

as long as I’m still something to you,
and as long as you won’t forget me that easily,
I’ll be your Grinch.

oh, I’ll be the Grinch…

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Black Holes

Staring at the pictures,
all where my eyes are green.
But truly, if you look close enough,
you’ll see things you’ve never seen.

My eyes are like the ocean—
seaweed to the brim—
my feelings getting tangled up in it,
and all because of him.

My eyes they match
with the seeds down in my heart;
the envy I have inside
has been planted since the start.

Our passion couldn’t die…
(or at least that’s what I thought)
but now my eyes are spider webs
and your love is no longer caught.

You would rather have a girl
where the history is real.
But for now, for us, it’s new and strange—
—my fear I can’t conceal.

My eyes will tell a tale;
It’s one that you might dread.
But you’ll know that
once my eyes
fill with tears
that our passion is gone and dead.

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Vita

It is being held
by a world
we should know;
but the world we know
is filled with
people,

more apart than together,

clinging onto
generic,
straight,
faces,
lying through
dying smiles;

claiming
the world
happens to be
smaller
and less worthy

of their affection.

Though, perhaps,
if they ventured
climbing off
of their high horse
they would see
in fact
a world
so large
and
unborn.

they would climb
back up
onto their high horse
only to pick a
rotting flower
to give a chance 
for a vita.

 

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"Everything goes away…" -Radical Face

In this moment I’m the youngest I’ll ever be, and nothing is going to be the same

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Buttons and Seams (Amongst Other Things)

I see you there,
trying to push my buttons,
and trying to make me lose the seams on my life.
But can’t you see
that I’m already naked?
And that all the seams have been disposed of?
And can’t you see
that my bare body
is glowing,
and reflecting in the sun?

You do,
and that, my friend, is the reason
that you’re trying to push my buttons
in the first place.

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For No Good Reason

The rules of the game
aren’t easy to translate—
which is exactly why you have to buy a ticket
and hop on the nearest train,
just to share memories at the top of the mountain
with that special someone you love,
and sleep all night,
and not awake till the morning.

Explorers will be mourning the haze that morning,
and disappointment will fill their hearts,
for they thought that this world would be
incredible
and
perfectly clean,
without a spot in the air.

But life must not
get lost in the knots
of the salty mountain air,
or the dunes,
or the shells of life

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Speak to Me

Listen to me
I can’t believe
That you weren’t there
For me

You left me strayed
With feelings frayed
And made me sad
I cried

What were you thinking
When you made promises
To me?

Why were you meaning
To love me
And instead just left me
Alone?

Here I am wondering
What could have gone
So wrong?

Please just speak to me.

My heart can’t breathe
In synch no more
I changed the locks
On the door

You made me scream
In agony
But first it was
Beautiful

That’s what love is
To see the truth
Behind the rude and mean

You fixed what broke
In my own soul
But then you broke
It all again

What were you thinking
When you made promises
To me?

Why were you meaning
To love me
And instead just left me
Alone?

Here I am wondering
What could have gone
So wrong?

Please just speak to me.

You played me well
I lost the way
And still you continued
To play

But then one day
I found my way
And realized what
I had to do

I let you leave
And still I cried
But now I have
God on my side

What were you thinking
When you made promises
To me?

Why were you meaning
To love me
And instead just left me
Alone?

Here I am wondering
What could have gone
So wrong?

Please just speak to me,
Please just speak to me,
Please just speak to me

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The Cow Jumped Over The Moon

It drizzles in the sunning stars,
It falls apart at noon,
The saddest part of the day,
Is when you see the moon.

The moon is calling liters,
The cow is crying blue,
The sun is shinning bright,
So throw away the loon.

For once what a thought it gives,
For the flying bird.
The greatest thoughts I ever felt
Are rising with the herd.

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